Dreams are often inexplicable. Its definition is very varied. A lot of people may confuse the definition of dreams with the concept of wishes. For me, dreams are those that change your mood, your emotions, body, mind and your heart starts beating really fast!
I was a kid with many wishes, but when I was18 I found the dream that would change my life: the possibility of traveling to the United States! Why the U.S.? This is a question that I am not even able to answer it.
There is a verse in the Bible which says that we could be awake all day and night long, and still, we will never be able to understand what God does. We can try, but we do not understand! (Ecclesiastes 9: 16.17)
And that's how I feel!
I had to face several obstacles that I may have the opportunity to share with you later, but the most beautiful thing is that I am closer than never to achieve my dream!
But to get there it was not so easy!
I had many false alarms and attempts to anticipate this dream, but now I understand that there is a right moment for all things (Ecclesiastes 3:1 To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven. ) I can't even count how many times I cried for being so anxious and for having such a big uncertainty about the things that would happen to me and how to reach and achieve that dream. My whole life was dedicated to live God's dream and I wondered if this was only my dream or he would be dreaming with me, until I realized that my love for my Lord was so big that He knew that achieving this dream without him it would not have the same joy and pleasure as happening under His will. In short, later I understood: it was our dream! How do I know that? That's a story for another blog.
For the first time, I applied myself for an international scholarship at St. Ambrose University that is directly related to my career field, but I could not make it due to studying my first semester in college. The next semester, I tried again, however, the new syllabus was established that year and it says that I could only participate in this scholarship contest after having studied the subjects of English, French and Spanish 4! And that would only happen in my fourth semester!
For sure, I was being tested on my anxiety and being forced to wait. As much as I knew that God was reserving the best for me, this waiting was "burning my neurons"!
I finally got in the fourth semester! Guess what? The coordinator of this exchange had to leave the project for a doctorate and now there was a new coordinator! So, I was freaking out get to know who was the new one.
I received some information that the new coordinator was delaying to open this scholarship selection for not having enough information from the university about how to handle it and make it! My God!
Finally, the selection process was opened and I was happy and surprised to receive so many emails from my classmates telling me if I knew about the scholarship selection process and if I had made my registration for it! I felt so much love in so many messages: "this is your moment!", "I believe in you", "God is with you and he will make your dreams come true!"
When I got the document explaining about the scholarship and how to participate, I realized that there was only one spot and I had to compete with the students from my course ( International Negotiations ) and people from Liberal Arts...
"Ok! I was the winner spermatozoon among thousands and thousands of sperms to fecundate the egg, why should I give up on this contest?" I thought. I had all the competences which were required to participate, however I have to fight pretty hard to get this scholarship. It would not be easy, but I don't want to be frustrated for not giving a try. But, if I fail it? Is this my moment? We'll see!
It may seem a miracle, but I was the only candidate who applied for it! Woo woo! However, I needed to get good test scores to prove that I was able to study at an American university, otherwise, I wouldn't be able to go.
I studied with some American friends of the project I was part of, I had some simulations for the interview to practice my English, I wrote a lot of essays to practice my writing , I prayed a lot, believing that if that was God's time for me, nothing could stop me!
Result? I was accepted with the highest grades! Oral test: 100%; Written test: 100%. I could hardly believe that I would be traveling to the United States in a couple months!
I definitely "would be "!
Some days after being accepted, I received a call from the coordinator saying that he wanted to talk to me about the exchange. My heart started beating really hard and fast!
Guess what? My trip to the university had to be postponed (again) due to some registrations of international students already concluded for that semester ...
I didn't know what to think ...
"Should I be happy because i am going anyways or cry for another postponement?"
I did both! LOL!
Many friends told me how good it would be going in the summer, then my heart stopped being so restless and I tried to relax my spirit. Overall, what could I do? I felt like everything I had to know was that "all things work together for those who love God and are called according to his purpose."
Now I can only count down the days... At least, I'm surely going to the United States next summer!
Today I am happy and satisfied about going later. Some American friends have invited me to spend Christmas, Thanksgiving Day and New Year's Eve in USA with them. It will be worth it! I was able to wait over a year to be accepted, why not waiting 6 more months to travel? Of course I can do this!
Do you know what comes next? I have no idea! I just know it will be the best experience of my life!